The highs and lows of self-hypnosis is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

Self-hypnosis is a new procedure that is taking the country by storm. Despite being relatively new compared to the usual hypnosis procedures with professionals, self-hypnosis has enjoyed a lot of buzz in recent years.

This is perhaps due to the fact that it is completely different from what people usually expect from hypnosis procedures which is a lot of control.

Although the same control can still be seen in self-hypnosis, that control will largely come from the patients themselves. There is no more hypnotist involved that can manipulate you into doing things that you don’t want to do and not know that you are doing at all. This time the control and the power to change will be all in your hands. The procedure actually answers two of the things that critics question about hypnosis itself.

The first one is the idea that a person other than yourself is controlling you and is entering your mind. Mind control is something that people still fear about until now. With self-hypnosis, there will be no hypnotist. Although they will be there to teach you the basics and guide you through the procedure as well as check on your progress, all the hypnosis will be in your hands. You will have control of your own mind, which is how things should be even in real life.

The next thing is the fact that you are not some kind of patsy that will just sit around and let things happen to you through the hypnotist. Now there is an effort coming from the patient itself. Change is no longer something done to you. Now you can do it yourself. A lot of the critics of hypnosis in the first place comes from the fact that people are not actively involved in the process. They are only recipients of the cure instead of being the problem solvers themselves.

This is especially true when it is used to curb a bad habit or get over an addiction. When attempting to change, a person should work hard at it otherwise, it will not be a change that comes from something internal. As they say easy come, easy go. Self-hypnosis however changes this fact as the patients themselves are active problem solvers being the hypnotist themselves.

One downside of self-hypnosis is the fact that it is done by an amateur— the patient who will probably know nothing about hypnosis except that fact that it can somehow solve his problem. Although the hypnotist will be there to guide you, an amateur will still be the one to handle everything and when you really think about it, will any sane person let an amateur get hold of their minds even if those persons are themselves? This is why one of the things that are often asked about self-hypnosis is its safety. According to experts, it is as safe as any hypnosis procedure, maybe even safer because at least this way, you can be sure that you are dealing with someone who is not there to con you.

Another disadvantage of self-hypnosis is the slow progress. Still, responses of people will also depend on whether they are receptive to the task or not. There are people who are more suggestible than other people and those who are not so suggestible will surely find it hard to find change.

Related posts:

1. What is Self Hypnosis – Self Hypnosis For Beginners

Basic methods for self hypnosis is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

As defined, self-hypnosis—also called “autohypnosis”—refers to a form of hypnosis where self-induction is used.

Here, the person who practices self hypnosis uses “autosuggestion” or self-suggestion to be able to adjust or overcome certain conditions or situations. In most cases, self-hypnosis is used as a therapeutic supplement along with hypnotherapy.

Before getting into self hypnosis the best way to go is to research about it thoroughly first. Through research, you can get extensive information about the practice and you will have a better understanding how it would benefit you the most. You can do your research by getting online and surf websites that offer information aligned with the practice. Because of the easy access to information today, you can get almost anything you need to know about it in an instant. In fact, with so many pieces of information about it, you might be overwhelmed. It would be better to be specific on the topics that you really would want to know about so you won’t be wasting your time searching for seemingly list of sites.

Aside from the Internet, you can also get information on various books as well as different magazines. Here, you can find interesting articles that can give you a better understanding of the practice especially on the methods that can be used according to the level of skills of the person.

If you are planning to conduct self hypnosis at home, it is best to ask people who have been practicing it for the basic methods that you can use. If you personally know people who are doing self hypnosis, it is best to get first hand information from them. Although you can get it also from the practitioners outside, it is still better if you get the facts straight from the people that you know. By doing this, you can get the best tips and advice on how to start with the practice and carry on with it for your personal as well as spiritual growth. Once enough information has been gathered, one can now start with self hypnosis.

Methods that are being used in self hypnosis

Experts in this field say that for self hypnosis to be successful, one should rely on the basic methods and learn them well. A considerable amount of knowledge on the basic methods will somehow help him or her be more familiar with the process and eventually be able to do it easier.

Today, most of the self hypnosis methods and techniques that are used may include induction procedures, methods for communicating with the subconscious part of the person’s mind and suggestion formulation and application. Here are two of the most commonly used methods for self hypnosis:

1. Self Hypnosis induction script. This refers to the induction talk for people who will be practicing self-hypnosis. For many people, they can used this as a guide to thinking their way down. In many instances, this is being recorded and can only be listened to during the practice itself.

2. Autoquestioning. This refers to the set of methods and techniques that are used to get information right from the person’s subconscious mind. Many people who practice self hypnosis use its subset, ideomotor questioning the most because the information gathered here are primarily used for correcting suggestions to change as well as acceptance and confirming of the person’s subconscious.

Related posts:

1. What is Self Hypnosis – Self Hypnosis For Beginners

The benefits of self hypnosis is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

Nowadays, people are now going back to older and natural practices because they know that the modern times have been causing them too much stress.

Of all the means of relaxation out there, more and more people are looking forward to experience the benefits of self hypnosis. Because of its effectiveness in terms of calming the mind and developing a person’s level of intuition, self hypnosis has now being performed not just a means of clearing the mind and inner reflection but also to heal various illnesses in the mind, emotions, and physical aspects.

Self hypnosis and its benefits

One of the most celebrated benefits of self hypnosis is that it greatly helps the person’s physical state. Among the physical benefits of self hypnosis involve the heart through a deep rest because it decreases the person’s metabolic rate as well as the heart rate, which leads to the reduction of workload for the heart. Also, self hypnosis can lower the levels of a person’s cortisol as well as dissolving the chemicals that are closely associated with everyday stress. Other physical benefits of self hypnosis also include reduced free radicals in the body by eliminating oxygen molecules that are unstable, decreases a person’s high blood pressure, develops the ability to have more resistant skin, improve air flow to the lungs to aid easy breathing, and delays biological aging in older people.

When it comes to psychological factor, self hypnosis aids in increasing the person’s brain wave coherence, decreasing anxiety levels, often irritability, deep-set depression, and swing of moods, improves the person’s memory as well as his or her learning ability, increases the person’s ability for self-actualization, increases the person’s feeling of youthfulness and rejuvenation as well as vitality, leads to positive outlook in life and joyfulness, and increases a person’s emotional status and stability. Other noted benefits of self hypnosis for an individual and his or her community include:

- relaxation to the person’s the body, mind, and soul,

- rejuvenation of energy to face the heavy challenges and stress ahead,

- healing of various illnesses that are closely-associated with the mind and the body,

- making a more stable person in terms of emotions,

- developments of relaxed family life and instilling positive outlooks in life to younger people,

- enhances the person’s ability to make his or her mind function properly,

- letting a person discover his or her inner self, this in turn releases the creativity in the,

- it helps people to free themselves from various vices and addictions such as alcohol and cigarettes as well as in various medications such as tranquilizers and narcotics,

- it also helps a person to gain higher self-confidence, thus, resulting to stronger power of the will,

- it can be an effective and safe way of discovering one’s self instead of focusing the attention to other unhealthy practices, and

- it aids in the development of the power of the mind.

The list goes on about the benefits of self hypnosis in an individual and to his or her community. In so many cases, these are positive benefits but once self hypnosis has not been used properly, people should be aware of the side effects. To avoid this from happening, people who are planning to get serious in meditation self hypnosis should always consult a professional before performing the practice.

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What is Self Hypnosis – Self Hypnosis For Beginners is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

When I started this self improvement blog, I did it not to write about self hypnosis, but to write about all sort of self improvement stuff that would help people, based on research and personal experiences.

However, when I was researching topics to write about for this self improvement site, self hypnosis kept coming up as a really interesting and popular topic.

So I delved into it, researched some self hypnosis people, products, techniques, tips and so on…

Before we start on this, if you’re not new to self hypnosis, nor a beginner, there will be more posts on those topics for self hypnosis techniques, self hypnosis tips and hopefully a free self hypnosis book.

OK, so what is self hypnosis, how does it work, and what do people use it for?

Today, more and more people practice self hypnosis even at the comforts of their own homes. Although this can be done, it is best to do with if one has knowledge or background on the practice. To know more about self hypnosis, a research must be done before actually trying it or practicing it at home. Research on self hypnosis can be done by using the Internet and looking for online sites that offer information on the subject. With just one click on any search engine, thousands of references may appear on the screen. Look for those sites that can link you to what would you want to know about the practice so you won’t have to waste time in searching all those links.

Aside from doing an online research, you can also get information from various books and magazines. There are actually so many health magazines that come up with features on self hypnosis because they believe that this can greatly help the overall well being of a person. If you know people who have been practicing self hypnosis, you can also ask them for some tips on how to start with it and how to make it easier for you.

One great way of being informed about self hypnosis is knowing how it started or where did it originate so you will have a better understanding of the practice. There were so many people who were considered as pioneers when it comes to self hypnosis. Many of them were influential in the practice and somehow formed what it is today just like Scottish physician and surgeon named James Braid who claims to discover self hypnosis or hypnotism in 1894. After discovering it, he first taught it to several clients before actually tried it to himself. His theory in self hypnosis says that but “feeling is the very truth” once you tried to use it when dealing with physical or emotional problems.

In the beginning of 20th century, Émile Coué had his take on self hypnosis as well. Many say that he is an influential figures when it comes to the subsequent development of the practice. He came up with the theory on “conscious autosuggestion” which eventually became renowned around the world for being an effective self-help system. His detachment from the concept of the usual “hypnosis” were passed to his followers like as Charles Baudouin who is one of the pioneers of modern hypnotherapists.

German psychiatrist Johannes Schultz also became a well known figure in the field of hypnosis when he developed “autogenic training”. This specific training is designed for relaxation and was made to public awareness when it was first published way back in the year 1932. The influence of Schultz in this approach was fellow German hypnotist named Oskar Vogt.

Hypnotherapist and early behavior therapist Andrew Salter also contributed a lot in self hypnosis when he published his first major academic journal on self-hypnosis that talked about the three techniques of autohypnosis in 1841involving “autohypnosis by post-hypnotic suggestion”, “autohypnosis by memorised trance instructions,” and “fractional autohypnosis”.

Who can benefit from self hypnosis?

Experts say that when used or practiced properly, self hypnosis can benefit everybody. This is everybody—who undergo different levels of stress and those who need motivation for personal development or to increase performance in strenuous activities such as sports. Self hypnosis can also be used for extensive modern hypnotherapy which can be done through a learned routine or through listening to a CD where the routine is recorded.

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4 Hour Body by Tim Ferriss is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

The 4 Hour Body book by Tim Ferriss will rock your world whether you’re a person who’s trying to eat right, get in shape, professional athlete, personal trainer or all of the above

The book strives to teach readers that there are a lot of myths out there about eating right, losing weight and is backed by lots of testing, testing, testing.

Tim’s a self-proclaimed experimental nut who seems to be striving for truth and no BS info on how to get the mos tout of his body and his life, Tim is author of the 4 hour work week and when I told people that this book existed, they outright laughed in my face because they don’t really understand what having a business is really all about due to having the employee mindset, but that’s another story.

There’s good points and bad points to Tim’s book the 4 Hour Body.

The good points are that you can follow this book, it’s teachings and recommendations and probably experience the results that you want to achieve with your sex life and fitness levels and weight management,

Tim does give readers some simple, easy to follow diet/eating regimen recommendations and makes it seem almost too easy to follow.

One thing that you might like, love or run away from is the concept that Tim brings up called, Minimal Effective Dose, (MED) which means the minimal required amount of food, minerals, carbs, protein, sugar, glucose, fat, exercise, repetitions etc… needed to achieve the required results for that eating or exercise session. I’ve had personal trainers work with me on running and weight lifting and there’s one thing I know for sure: that someone like myself who truly enjoys pushing himself and working out has wasted a TON of time doing exercises improperly, and a ton more time doing workouts the wrong way.

They call boxing the sweet science, and the more you know about boxing the more you know this to be a good way to describe that sport, and the same applies to working out, eating right, and manipulating your body to achieve desired maximum effective results.

One time when I was really into weightlifting, I downloaded a workout regimen off the internet that was geared towards building up a broader back and more developed shoulders. the exercise routine was very explicit on what to do and when, and had a weird mix of repetitions to do, weights to use, and the sequence really didn’t make sense to me because I thought I knew how to lift weights properly. Well, I did this routine for 3 weeks and didn’t expect to see any results, but I was bored with my current routine and back and shoulders wasn’t a huge narcissistic priority of mine so I really didn’t care whether it worked or not.

One day I was over a girlfriend’s house and was in kitchen putting dinner plates away after a meal and she noticed the changes, and could tell that the back and shoulders were just all around bigger and bulkier! I was surprised to hear this and really didn’t believe it, but she hadn’t seen me for 2 weeks so I guess she noticed it better than I would, and this was with a shirt on, not off, which means it definitely worked.

The point this the aforementioned rambling is…. there’s a science to doing things effectively and really, it’s more like an art form because you have to do the exercises properly, in the right sequence, with prescribed periods of rest in between, and you have to put the effort in as well. therefore, there’s a lot of things that can go wrong, but if you hit everything just right, even a workout routine that doesn’t make sense….like much of what Tim prescribes doing in 4 hour Body won’t make sense to you,,, will work because we’re dealing with MEDS here, minimal effective doses.

The bad side to reading this, and it’s got nothing to do with the book itself is…. you will have to unlearn a lot of stuff that has been drilled into your head and a lot of what is taught in this book goes against natural conventional wisdom in the mainstream dietary recommendations and what-not.

For example, everyone says fruit is good for you right? It has fiber, and makes you poop more often thereby cleaning your system of waste more often so you don’t carry around inside your body pounds of waste, but Tim says fruits to be avoided and gives his reasons, you will have to read the book to find out why he advises against having fruit in your diet as this is not the place to debate such a thing.

The reason I say there’s a bad side to reading Tim’s book is that you have to be willing to follow everything he says to the letter, otherwise you’re going to be battling what you think you know to be true (eat fruits) and you’re going to end up cherry-picking what you feel like doing, and end up doing a mix-and-match with your current eating regimen and you’ll end up following two different ways of doing things and end up achieving less.

Some advice Tim gives for workouts that rings true, and IS true….

It’s better to have an eating an exercise regimen that’s easy to follow than it is to have one that’s hard, and tough, because it’s more EFFECTIVE in the long run to implement new habits that you will do consistently.

how many fad diets have you been on that really sucked because maybe your bad carbs addiction hasn’t quite left you yet. yes carbohydrates, and bad carbs are addictive and I know this to be true, but you can wean yourself off bad food quite easily if you follow an eating plan that keeps you full, is filled with preservatives-free “stuff” and it end sup changing your palate, your tastes.

There used to be a time when the smell of potato chips, Dorito’s or a Chinese food place would drive me towards and impulsive eating binge which I always enjoyed. Old habits die hard though, and when I ever so rarely indulge on those things on a cheat day for eating, I almost always regret it, but more for the fact that I just don’t feel good after eating it, not because I gained weight from doing those things. After you eat clean healthy, preservatives-free food for a while, you tend to spoil your taste buds and body into feeling good and not bogged down, so when you DO eat crap food, it won’t feel good, and as was mentioned earlier in this review, if something doesn’t feel good (like an exercise or eating habit) then you end up quitting that behavior because it’s human nature to be attracted to comfort, and to be repelled by discomfort.

…..So there’s some real down to earth common sense advice here in Tim’s 4 Hour Body book, and if I didn’t trust my personal trainer so much, I’d probably take this book as my new Fitness Bible because it really does cut to the core of what you can do. It is by design a book written to help you get the absolute most of our limited time on this earth, and the concepts are solid.

Tim Ferriss’ 4 Hour Body reviews, and points to ponder…

1- It’s a good book, it destroys some health myths

2- It’s geared towards people who want more for themselves in less time

3- It’s appeal is fad-like, kind of like 7-minute-abs (which you don’t get unless you eat properly by the way)

4- It has simple, easy to follow eating an exercise plans

5- There’s plenty of common sense concepts in here that can hopefully make you avoid fad diets and exercise routines and focus instead on consistent quality workouts and dietary practices.

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The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

This is a review on the book The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman and the movie that eventually spawned from it, but as usual the book is far better than the movie so this review will focus more on the book, but will have a Peaceful Warrior movie trailer at the end.

I got The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior TWOTPW by Dan Millman as a gift from a co-worker during a Christmas gift exchange swap, and it started my own a quest for self improvement and awareness that I didn’t know existed in me.

I recommend this book for a lot of reasons, but first allow me to delve into some details on what the book is about without giving away anything:

The protagonist in the book was a college athlete who was running through life in a hard core manner, drinking like a college student, vain about his great body and good looks, and destined to become an Olympic athlete (gymnast).

One night he can’t sleep and wakes up to go down to local SERVICE station (gas station) for whatever reason….

There he meets “Socrates” the service attendant there, and this is where HIS quest for self-awareness and improvement begins.

Socrates does some things to challenge our “hero”, and he meets with frustration when challenged by Socrates, and like any achiever/athlete he has a desire and need to prove himself to himself and to others.

The book isn’t like Good Will hunting where the teacher/mentor learns as much about him/herself and the person they’re helping. In this story the teacher Socrates pretty much has his shit together, and nailed down tight.

I could write endlessly about this book and all the other books that spawned from it, but that would ruin the enjoyment you might glean from this book should you decide to get it.

Instead, I want to focus more of my review of this book and some points you should get from it.

Why is it called the The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior?

Because the REAL struggles most of us face aren’t physical, but mental…

Have you ever tried

• to change how you think,
• to become a more positive person,
• to be more patient,
• to be more understanding,
• to be more empathetic,
• to be a more productive person,
• or lose weight,
• or quit smoking,
• or make any other type of change within yourself?

It’s hard isn’t it? And that’s why we focus on PEACEFUL WARRIORS here when we want to try and get something out of this book. The REAL struggles with self-improvement, awareness and self-acceptance come start and end from within yourself, your mind, your psyche, your attitude, etc….

Some points I hope you get form this book should you decide to get it:

NOTE: I realize that some of this stuff may sound new-agey to some people so if you’re a fundamentalist (insert religion here) then I hope you’re open minded enough to try and see the wisdom points and tie them into your own core of set beliefs should you have any.

Stop and smell the flowers… Ever hear that expression?

Well, in The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior Socrates explains how we miss so much of what’s going on around us all the time because we’re so busy hustling to and form one thing after another, busy doing things that fill up our minds with noise that overcomes and overshadows the real stuff we should be paying attention to if we really wanna experience life to the fullest.

Example: In my yoga classes we do a meditation exercise whereby we sit still in comfortable position and try to focus on all our body parts, every inch just to become aware of ourselves more and to also cause a deep relaxation by also focusing on anything but our daily mindset hustle and bustle. The end result is two-fold

#1- We create a mind-body awareness that may not have existed before, but if that connection did exist before, well a deeper focus leads to a more connected sense of self.

#2- When we focus on things within, or things we’re missing due to a noisy brain, we tend to relax a little bit more, we slow our heart rates, we end up relaxed…

So, one of the points to this book is related to that age old maxim, stop and smell the flowers” because when we focus on the present instead of the past or future, then we become more aware, and when we become more aware, we tend to see beauty we never noticed before, we will see things that were always there but never really entered our mind. Why is any of this missing stuff important though? Because it means we’re blocking things out of the forefront of our consciousness and that we’re missing out on things in life.

Way of the Peaceful Warrior Book – Dan Millman speaks in the video below

The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior Movie Review and Trailer

The movie was good, focused a bit more on the character Joy than I though tit would, but it’s hollywood, and you gotta play up the romance angle to put asses in seats I guess. The book didn’t emphasive the Joy/Dan relationship that much but movie did so whatever…it is what is.

The movie did a great job emphasizing Dan’s mental anguish, car accident, explosiveness of emotions, dealing with those emotions, and did a REALLY good job of emphasizing a point I made earlier in the book review part of this post, which is that if you stop to “slow your roll” you will see just how much you’re missing and overlooking and that you should focus on the present to experience more out of life.

The movie was good, entertaining and helped reinforce some points made in the book, but this movie is more for TWOTPW book fans than it is for mainstream movie goers.

Click Play Below to watch the trailer, but buy the book or all his books first… since books are always better than movies

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Complacency, the enemy of self-actualization is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

It’s human nature to seek comfort.  We all want to be warm, safe, happy and comfortable.

We want stability, we want routines, things and people we can depend on, but we also like having something we look forward to doing or experiencing.

Some people look forward to a cocktail or two after work to take “the edge” off, (or rather, to dull the senses to help take the edge off).

How many times have you heard people asking,

“what’s the meaning of life, why am I/are we here, what’s the point to this existence?”

I’m not going to answer that since many others before me have tried and there’s a lot of answers to this, and people who are truly looking for answer will find one that suits them.

Some self-help gurus will tell you that Man’s purpose in life is to serve God, or other higher power, while others state that purpose doesn’t matter, but experiencing the NOW is where your focus should be.

In my humble opinion, people are seeking reasons for existence because they’re not quite as happy as the could be.  I opine that seeking a purpose is equivalent to seeking a method by which to get true happiness out of life.

In my psychology classes in college and high school we learned about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, and at the top of the hierarchy, or pyramid, was the term self-actualization.

SELF-ACTUALIZATION-  in layman’s terms it means to reach your potential, your true utmost achievable ACTUAL potential for your SELF.

Without purpose, or a drive to seek a purpose, there are no goals set, therefore no achievements, therefore no ACTUAL realization of the true potential of the self.

Without purpose, or goals all we’re left with is complacency.

Why do people have middle-age crises?

Because they had their noses buried in work, careers, marriages, which is all well and good since those institutions can help individuals better themselves by developing their natural skills that made them enter that particular line of work, and to develop themselves as a soul mate/partner, but is that what we really need to do and experience in order to reach self-actualization?

Did we major in finance because that’s our passion, or because we knew that majoring in finance was a good path towards a lucrative career?

If you have a talent and true passion for finance, then maybe this career path is going to help you self-actualize, but in most cases, people find their true “happy place” at home or away from work doing something else entirely.

Complacency… in life in work at home.

Why do marriages get stale, old?

why does the sex life wane over time?

Because it’s SO easy to let happen, since complacency is the easiest thing to let happen to you. Remember, we like routines, safety, things we know, but those are somewhat short lived and can get “old”…

Marriages require work and dedication to self and to significant others, and careers do, too to a certain extent.  If you want to move ahead in your career complacency is NOT a virtue but something that going to get you passed over for promotions and even from seeking other horizontal or vertical movements up or across career ladders.

goal setting

You’ve heard it before, without goals there are no achievements

Why’s that important?

Because without achievements there’s no chance of self actualization.

Tips for setting goals…

1. Do it for the right reasons.
2. Set goals that will bring you some sort of long-lasting happiness
3. Set long term and short term goals

Late in 2010 I weighed 230 pounds, my heaviest ever, and I was slaving away on a treadmill trying to shave off a few pounds when I saw a running magazine.

The articles were talking about road races, marathons, running tips for ednurance runners, and being someone who had run 2 marathons previously, I got something akin to an epiphany…

I said to myself, “self, why not do another marathon, the next one is 5-6 months away and you have plenty of time to run it?”

So, I took my SHORT TERM goal of losing a few pounds here and there and turned it into a long term goal, to run the Boston Marathon.

My thinking was, why not focus on a long term goal instead of a short term goal, that way I can focus on one far-away goal and let the journey be the reward.

Meaning… the journey would consist or running lots of miles without regard for weight loss, which would be a natural byproduct of running 30-50 miles a week.

So the weight loss goal which is semi-permanent for me, became a sub-goal, a sub-achievement and the loftier goal of running a Boston Marathon become the higher achievement goal.

Now, when I run this race on April 18th, 2011 my satisfaction with self will be that much greater because I gave myself a harder to achieve goal, but in the meantime I will have lost close to 50 pounds, form 230 down to 180 or so…

Point?

Even when setting goals, don’t be complacent, give yourself long term loftier goals to derive more satisfaction out of your achievements.

Once a goal gets reached, especially long term goals, the feeling is almost anti climactic, so you should remember that complacency is always waiting and ready to jump into your mindset and get you back into normal routine that don’t help you self actualize as an individual.

I can say with 100% certainty that I would not have lost 50 pounds in the last 5-6 months if my goal was merely to run on a treadmill and hope to lose a few pounds here and there.

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Typical Steps Towards Happiness and Self Improvement is a post from: Self Improvement And Motivation

When we first start out in cognitive awareness (are born) we first experience things as they are to us, meaning that we take things at face value.

There was an anecdote in one of Carlos Castenada’s books (the name escapes me at the moment) where the author depicted how a young Native American child was asked was asked,

“what color is that pony”… The pony was black and white, and striped and was standing off to the side, therefore only one side of the pony was exposed to view…

The child replied, “it’s black and white, on this side…”

The child didn’t assume the other side of the pony looked the same, but with experience would probably “know” that the pony was stripe don the other side, too and same colors, but didn’t assume that.

Point being, experience brings knowledge of sorts but also jades new learning experiences because it means we attached previous knowledge to new epxeriences.

So when we start out in life, we merely experience things as they appear to us, we make no assumptions, we’re accepting things as they are, and assume nothing since we don’t have any experiences yet by which to make projections and assumptions.

So, with that tought in mind, let’s think of how we pereceive ourselves as individuals, and where the quest for self-improvement and motivation come into play.

We start out absorbing everything.

Then we develop perosnalities

Then we start seeing ourselves as part of a community

Thne self-awareness kicks in.

With self-awareness comes judgment, and when we start to analyze how we interact with others.

Are we cool, likeable, friendly, funny, smart, good looking, etc…?

What do we want to be?  Do we like who we are?

These are the questions that arise from the self awareness phase, and this phase begets the self-improvement phase.

The self-improvement phase….

Once we find out who we are, or start finding out more and more about ourselves, we explore interests, and depending on our psyhes and mindsets and attitudes towards ourselves and others, we start making some assessments…

I want to be smarter, more cool, more good looking, athletic, academic, richer etc…

For a lot of a people the self-improvement phase is a never-ending one and in my opinion, I don’t think this is a phase we always want to put most o four focus on.

To be truly happy, I think we need to morph our quest for self-improvement into a hybrid mode of sorts. whereby we’re still trying to improve our self, but also realizing that it’s OK if we don’t become the riches, coolest, smartest person/people ever…

Example:  Let’s say that part of your quest for self improvement was to manage your time better and it’s something you’ve always struggled with…  At some point I/you/we have to realize that we may NEVER be the best manager of our time, because there’s other parts of our personality over-riding this achievement (good time management)

Maybe we like keeping busy, and filling up our days with bust work and activities.

So what if you’re no tmanaging your time well and are constantly late for stuff, as long as it doesn’t REALLY negatively affect your life, it’s OK, it really is.

Am I saying we should not strive to better ourselves?

No, not at all, but what I am trying to point out here is that if there’s something we’ve always been bad at, or need improvement upon, let’s analyze why we’re trying to improve on this “thing” and what the real reason is for trying to making things different?

To please others or to please ourselves?

The quest for self improvement should start with the underlying notion that achievement of said quest will make us happier in some way, but as was aforementioned, what if your personality and lifestyle is such that you like things the way they are?

Anyhow… just food for thought here….

Recap:

We start out finding out about ourselves, then we develop ourselves via academics and in the work force, then we strive for self improvement for whatever reasons, but to be truly happy at some point you just need to accept yourself as you are.

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